Tuesday, June 28, 2011

BREAKING NEWS*

*In no way is this actually real news 
Al-Rayyan, Qatar:  The drama continues for Targuy Ngombo.  Three days after the world discovered he lied about his age to enter the NBA draft (which does not allow international players over the age of 22 to participate), the Portland Trail Blazers’ Interim General Manager Chad Buchanan uncovered some startling news before the trade with Minnesota officially went through: Ngombo hired infamous Dominican pitcher Danny Almonte to help him gain entry to the draft.  When contacted by Buchanan, Almonte confessed, “Targuy called me up and asked if I could help him make his dream come true.  He kept going on and on and on about how dominant I was at the Little League World Series when I was 32; how could I deny him my help?!  But I thought I was helping another Dominican get into the majors.”  Ngombo could not be reached for comment.

--Jonathan

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