Friday, July 22, 2011

David Kahn’s Confused Identity


By Jonathan Ryan Davis

As Blazer’s Edge recently reported (link here), Minnesota GM David Kahn, a native Portlander and former attendee of B’Nai Brith Camp in Neotsu, OR, will interview Rick Adelman for the Wolves’ vacant head coaching position.  Kahn, who retains a residence in SW Portland, appears to struggle with separation anxiety from Portland (which likely started after his departure from The Oregonian in the late 1980s) by seeking any possible head coach candidate with Blazers ties.

Adelman will be the third candidate to interview with a Blazers connection, following PG extraordinaire and current Blazers analyst Terry Porter and current Blazers Assistant Bernie Bickerstaff, who interviews today.   Word is Kahn was indoctrinated at a young age to believe the Portland Trail Blazers are the solution to every problem.  He was told, if you have an unsolvable situation, turn to the Blazers, be it on television, through their kickass sports writers (which he was), or more powerful than anything, to absorb the heart, magic, and passion that goes along with meeting or working with a real life actual Blazers player or coach.  To Kahn, the Blazers brought, and he hopes will continue to bring, inner warmth and light into his life.

In an effort to cover up his true hiring intentions, Kahn is placating owner Glen Taylor and Wolves fans by interviewing Mike Woodson (who will end up a Piston) and Nellie, who could help the team score a lot of points while retaining its spot as a bottom feeder of the Western Conference.

Adelman is too good to take the job at Minnesota, but the power of Love might be enough to attract him, which is exactly Kahn’s plan.  In Kahn’s eyes, a player and coach Portland connection can bring a championship to the Twin Cities.

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